Money Laundering

James and I went to a far flung casino last weekend; a small one there on the water in Anacortes. I hate carrying a purse around there, fearful that it might get nabbed or I might leave it behind, so I put my ID, cell phone, and cash into my coat pocket. After a short time of playing tables and slots I get too warm and tie my lightweight jacket around my waist (which James won for free in Marysville on the way up there. He spun some wheel at the local Washington Mutual bank and got the grand prize - this nice buttery colored windbreaker in my size).

Of course I have to go to the bathroom at some point and I head off to the ladies room. It was very nice, beautiful color scheme, artfully placed custom tile work, auto-sensory water faucets and hand towel machines and the like. Very nice in all. After leaving my share of liquid in the receptacle, I moved to rise from my sitting position; plunk! All my cash, ID, players card, and cell phone slid easily out of my coat pocket plopped right into the toilet. I froze, knowing that the toilet would automatically flush the minute I moved away from the toilet. What are my options? To reach or not to reach, that was the big question. Do I let 'em all flush? Do I want to lose the over $100 in cash and a cell phone? (Who cares about the ID, that is easier to replace.) I make my decision and quickly whip around, pants still around my ankles, and fish out the bundle, barely making the grab as the toilet began to flush. I think a dollar or two actually got sucked down even. But I did rescue the phone and a bulk of my money and my ID and players card.

I spent the next 20 minutes washing every bill, every card and carefully wiping down the cell phone. I'd have to deal with that one later. Once my money was clean again (though very wet). I immediately went and stuffed it into a ticket machine and traded it in for a slot ticket. I then went and cashed in my slot ticket. I laundered my money!!!! Cool. However, the cell phone was another problem. I managed to find a basket of hand wipes near the bar for player's use. I grabbed a couple and thankfully noticed they were antiseptic. Nice. I sat down and wiped down every nook and cranny of my phone, even emoving the battery. I kept the now cleaned phone off and in pieces in my pocket.

When we got back to our room later that night I put the phone, open and without the battery, and on the heat register. My hope was that it would help dry out the innards. It really was only in the toilet for a few short seconds before I fished it out. Surely it would be o.k.

Not. Even after a few alternate methods of heating the phone up to try and dry out components, it still doesn't work right. Oh it turns on o.k., but it keeps beeping, turning the speakerphone on and off and on and off, and it won't let me call or receive calls. I think it is pissed at me (hah!).


So there's the saga of the phone.

Where Did I Put My Big Stick?

I constantly beat myself up; and I carry a really, really big stick. I've been plagued with some stupid low self esteem thing, which I've been told is really a version of pride, forever. How it translates to pride, I'm not sure (I think I used to understand), but I know I certainly don't feel proud about myself.

My most vigorous beatings are related to my weight. Those who know me best know this is the case. I've been on a diet for about 10 years now. I figure I've lost hundreds of pounds over those ten years. I lose a few pounds, then gain them back, then lose them again, then gain them back. I keep extra ones in the closet just for the joy of losing them every month or so; just for kicks.

No, I'm not terribly overweight. It's not a huge amount of weight we're talking about here; probably less than 20 pounds. My family tells me I look fine. Right. They're being nice. But the problem is, is that I don't feel fine about myself. I spent all but the last 10 years of my life being underweight, even anorexic through many of those years. Now, since a hysterectomy, my weight has slowly crept up year after year. The last six months have been notably horrendous and most of my clothes don't even fit right now.

What is my problem? Why do I care? Should I give up and just throw out anything that doesn't fit and realize that I'm not young anymore and this is just what happens? Or should I continue to fight this and stretch my decade long diet into infinity and beyond?

I know I could fight this better than I am. Firstly, I used to work out regularly and I stopped that last summer. I had a terribly depressing family issue that kinda got me started into this downhill slide, plus I had my schedule loaded which made making the time difficult. However, now I do have the time and I don't workout like I used to. I do some, but not like I should. I'm way to sedimentary.

My second issue is that I do eat too much. Hubby eats out a lot, we go places, we see people, we do things; many of which mean I'm not at home where I can keep the calories in check. I know, we're supposed to learn to eat smart at restaurants. But, be honest. When you're faced with a great pasta dish with chicken and cream with a side Caesar, are you going to do that, or eat a vegetable plate? Hmmm??? Oh yes, give me the veggie plate! NOT!!!

I have to figure out how to come to terms with my lack of will power. Obviously I don't want to be thin enough to make the appropriate effort to make the pounds drop off and stay off. I should be able to make it happen. I must not want it bad enough. I must want to flog myself daily about my food failings.

Enough for now, I have to go find my stick.

It's Done

My son got married two weeks ago. He's my youngest child. I was not prepared for the emotional upheaval it created in my heart. My heart stirs with various different emotions and it is hard to flow with each one. I'm prouder than proud of him and what he's accomplished; his success in life in general, but more importantly, his stance and passion for the Lord. Yet, there's also a subtle emotion of vacancy, for lack of a better word. I'm not the most important woman in his life anymore. I've always felt a strong bond with my son. While I don't think the bond is less, it is just different. I'm not sure how to articulate it, but it doesn't hurt really; just different than anything I've experienced before.

Mandy, my oldest daughter, is getting married here in about 6 weeks. Maybe I'll go through all that again??? I kinda doubt it though. She's been married before and my bond with her is unlikely to change much being female to female. Ahhh the joys of getting older and watching my children grow up, sigh...

Another subject. I'm very frustrated this week. Mandy and James (her Dad, my husband) had a big blow up on Monday. Now they both are talking to me about how the other person is this or that, and should have done this or that. The weird thing is that I see both points AND they are both very similar. I think that's why they butt heads so much. Mandy wants her Dad to just call and say hi and quit studying her every action and word under a microscope and telling her everything she's doing wrong. James wants Mandy to not be so aggressive and opinionated and grouchy. I think they bring all that out in each other.

The big problem is that their conflicts reach everyone who touches them: me, Ricky & Rosie, Daniel (Mandy's soon-to-be husband). If those two don't get along, then it kinda ruins it for the rest of us. I'll just have to keep praying on this one.

Lord help us all!

Cool Photos

I'm posting some of my photos that are from the last two trips to Italy. Have fun looking! I hope to go back again sometime in the next five years or so.



Beautiful Italy

I Know....

I know it's been a very long time since I've said a word. What can I say? Sorry.

Well, we decided to keep the house and rent it out. The new Narrows Bridge will be complete in the next year or so and we're banking on the fact that better traffic flow could help prices in that area.

When we went to refinance the house (the loan we took over from the buyers was at a very high interest rate) we found out that there was a hidden feature that took us by surprise. Turns out the original loan the couple had negotiated included a pre-payment penalty! The amount was almost $5,000! Aww shucks! Now, even if we had decided to sell it, we probably would have made only a couple of thousand dollars. Not much considering all the work. Not a good deal in my book. So we bit the bullet, paid the penalty and refinanced the house. The savings in the house payment ends up making the decision a good one in the long term. We hope to keep it for a few years and then sell it.

We got it rented this last week and all is good to go. The house looks beautiful and the new renters are very happy with how it looks.

Thanks for sticking close during the renovation process. It was a wild 12 weeks of rehabbing! The big question for me is: would I do this again? I've mulled it around for a while and determined that I would, but only with a few stipulations. 1) I would not do it while I was working; I'd have to take at least a month off. 2) I would try to stick to the project management portion of the job and leave more of the actual work to others. (I'm getting too old for this). However, maybe if I weren't working a 40+ hour week job, this wouldn't be such a big deal.

Now I can turn my blog back into other issues to write about: life, kids, travel, cool photos I've taken, and other nice and fun things that occupy my time.

See you all soon!